Thought for the day for Beverley FM for Remembrance Sunday 2024

 My Dad is 97, and although he doesn’t always remember things that have happened in the last few days, his recall of his childhood remains pretty clear – as is often the case when people get older.

Dad lived through the second world war. He left school in 1941 at the age of 14 and worked in the huge Ordnance Depot in Chilwell, just outside Nottingham, as an errand boy.

His mother – my grandma – was widowed during the First World War. Her first husband (not my grandfather), Horace, went off to war, but was sadly killed on March 24^th 1918 during the German counter-offensive. When I eventually got out to France to see his memorial at Pozières and brought back photos, I was able to show pictures to my uncle and aunt who were Horace’s children. No-one from the family had visited the location before.

Pozières cemetery and memorial

Grandma died in 1973, aged 87, and I was too young to have had a proper conversation with her about what happened. However, my dad describes an occasion when they were sheltering together from an air raid. There was a radio in the shelter, and the announcer gave out the number of German aircraft shot down that night by the RAF. The people in the shelter understandably cheered, but my dad remembers vividly that his mum did not. She quietly said “they’re some mother’s son”.

Let’s be clear, my grandma wanted to see the tyranny of Hitler defeated. She was no sympathiser with the enemy. But she retained the capacity to understand the common humanity we all share. She had received that awful news of the loss of her husband and she knew that families would be getting the same news far away. They may be on opposite sides of the conflict, but their grief would be the same.

That family story is always in my mind on Remembrance Sunday. It isn’t a celebration,  nor is it a moment to be triumphalistic. It was always intended to be a pause for sober recollection of the terrible human cost of conflict, of thanksgiving for those who put their own lives on the line for our freedom, and to commit to doing all we can to avoid it happening again.

When Jesus said “love your enemies and pray for your persecutors”, I don’t believe he was saying we should condone evil, or collude with injustice. However, I do think he was reminding us that even in the height of human division and conflict, there are some commonalities in our human condition. We are all created in the image of God, even though that image is often terribly obscured and dimmed, and we reduce our own humanity when we cease to remember the humanity of others – even those with whom we are in bitter conflict. They are, to quote my grandma, some mother’s son or daughter.

FIFA and poppies

Theresa May has said that it is "utterly outrageous" that FIFA have ruled that poppy logos may not be used on the shirts of the players in the forthcoming England v Scotland qualifier. I know this is a delicate and controversial subject, so I just want to share the questions that it prompted as I reflected upon it.

1. Is is a "poppy ban"?
No - it's a blanket ban. The ban is against all symbols which have a political or religious connotation. When the question about poppies was put to FIFA, it ruled them out on this basis (as it did in Nov 2011) - hence the row. FIFA has to deal with all kinds of sensitivities over symbols and logos all over the world, and in many situations (just think of the Middle East, or even the Balkans, for example) a symbol or logo can be highly inflammatory. Nearer to home, the poppy has become identified with one side in the divisions of Northern Ireland, and has a political connotation there, even if it hasn't in the rest of the UK. And we have to bear in mind that just because something hasn't a political or religious connotation for me, it doesn't mean it doesn't for anyone.

For an England v Scotland game, all players have roots in the respective nations, both of which observe the remembrance ceremonies. In such a context, blanket rules can appear harsh. But might it not be safer to abide by them, rather than risk setting a precedent which could lead to something much more controversial elsewhere? That is the kind of question FIFA has to wrestle with.

This was all expressed very well by Rory Smith on Radio 5 Live

2. Surely wearing a poppy is voluntary?
Wearing poppy logos on football kits is a fairly recent initiative as far as I am aware. It now routinely happens for league games on the weekend of Remembrance Sunday. I have sometimes wondered what players from other nations make of it, and I also noted that it effectively makes wearing a poppy compulsory. There was considerable controversy when James McClean refused to wear a logo shirt in 2014. Regardless of what we make of his particular reasons, we should at least note that this has effectively made poppy wearing compulsory for footballers.

Likewise, there is considerable pressure on those appearing on TV over this period to wear a poppy, and not doing so generates controversy. Looking at some of the ostentatious poppies that have been worn on X-Factor, etc, I have wondered whether we are beginning to miss the underlying meaning. The simplicity of the original poppy was surely part of the point, and the value was that is was a voluntary act, expressing support for the families of the fallen, and those who were injured in conflict.

As the Royal British Legion themselves say:

"Wearing a poppy is a personal choice and reflects individual and personal memories. It is not compulsory but is greatly appreciated by those it helps – our beneficiaries: those currently serving in our Armed Forces, veterans, and their families and dependants."

Obliging people to wear a poppy under pressure is no way to generate the respect and observance which the most vocal proponents desire. Indeed it can be very counter-productive, as Dominic Sandbrook noted last year in (of all things) the Daily Mail!

3. Why Now, and Why This?
Back in the 1940s and perhaps even in the early 50s, some active players would have served in the forces. Some died, others were injured, and all would have had clear memories of the war - whether from home, or from active service. What is curious is that the same pressure to have logo shirts doesn't seem to have been around. I can only speculate that for them, the civic and church ceremonies of remembrance were a sufficient expression of loss, sadness and respect. I expect most wore poppies on the clothes they wore on the way to the match, but not on the pitch. It made me wonder why it wasn't enough to mark remembrance in other ways - e.g. laying a wreath and/or a silence before the match starts. Why does the poppy have to be on the football shirt itself for respect to be properly expressed?

Perhaps it tells us something about where people find and express meaning, now that only a small proportion of the population do so in church. Perhaps these civic signs and symbols express and convey what religious symbols used to do, and that is why they become loaded with such emotion. I also wonder whether in this context of brexit, it reveals that (at least some) Brits want to assert themselves against another international organisation perceived as telling them what to do. Given FIFA's recent track record, it's not surprising they're getting criticised.

I'll finish with what I wrote 6 years ago on the subject of poppies, in the context of the Scottish Premier League insisting on poppies for all SPL football kits that weekend:

"If the controversy focuses on the external symbols of remembrance, then we're missing the point. Wearing a poppy doesn't create respect for those who have died - respect is something that has to come from somewhere deeper than that. For others, remembrance is something they wish to keep discreet and internal, and not be forced into expressing it in a fixed form dictated by society at large. 

So I won't judge anyone on whether they happen to be wearing a poppy or not. I will be wearing one today and on Sunday as I remember the tragedy and loss of war, with so much potential and possibility cut short and as I pray that wars on such scale are never seen again. 

My grandfather survived the trenches. I think he only ever spoke 5 or 6 sentences about it in all the time I knew him. He remembered, and I got the impression that he would have been all too happy to forget most of what he had witnessed. We remember his companions who didn't return, and their suffering and sacrifice in the hope that it will inspire future generations to seek justice and peace in a troubled world." Nov 11 2010

Boundaries of Remembrance

It was inevitable that this year would see an increased emphasis on remembrance as we marked the centenary of the outbreak of the First World War earlier this year. The monuments, memorials and most of all the commemorations on Remembrance Sunday are all part of the way our nation came to terms with its terrible death toll of between 7 & 800,000 (depending on which records are used). It's a staggering loss of life, and yet only a fraction of the number of people killed overall in the 14-18 conflict.

Armistice Day itself (11 Nov) was adopted as a public holiday by several nations, but in the UK, the outbreak of World War 2 led to the moving of the commemoration to the nearest Sunday - it was less disruptive to war production (which has its own irony). That is where the main ceremony has stayed since, although 11/11 has acquired a greater significance in recent years. That has led to some confusion. For example, here in Morecambe we had the main town ceremony on Sunday with over 1,000 people present and many organisations taking part. However, people were still asking about what was happening on 11/11 at the cenotaph with a sense of disappointment that it was not a major event. But for those of us there on Sunday, it would feel strange to be back doing the same thing again so soon.

It begs the question as to whether we need a new national consensus on which day we should use, and where remembrance begins and ends. Some people have argued that the UK should have a Bank Holiday between August and Christmas, perhaps relocating one of the holidays in May. One option might be to use 11/11. If we did that, then all UK ceremonies could take place on Armistice Day and there would be no parallel ceremonies or repetition. Our remembrance would be focussed on the one significant date when the guns fell silent.

It's also interesting which conflicts get included and which don't. Prior to 1914, relatively few war memorials were made. There is a very rare Crimean War memorial in my home town of Beeston. And I suspect that many people miss the fact that our church building contains a Boer War Memorial:

It's interesting that a war that ended at the start of the 20th century with over 20,000 British and allied dead (there were similar scale losses in Crimea) ends up being almost completely overlooked. Possibly it's due to there being some lasting unease about the conduct and legacy of parts of that campaign.

Of course the important thing is not the physical memorial, but the knowledge and appreciation of the cost and destructiveness of war. When memorials say 'lest we forget', it's a sobering reminder that the tragedy of bereavement represented by each name was repeated thousands and thousands of times up an down the country, and that should be all the motivation we need to inspire us to work ceaselessly for peace and reconciliation.

Poppies and Martin

In my previous job, today was an even more complicated mixture of issues and emotions than it is now. November 11th is not only Armistice Day, but it's also St Martin's Day, so we tried to mark that each year in the Chapel of the College that bore his name. Legend has it that one of the previous chaplains used to do a firework display to celebrate St Martin and regularly received complaints from people who saw it as disrespectful to the fallen.

Martin himself was a soldier who became a bishop and a scholar. Given that he is the patron saint of both France and soldiers, it is perhaps no coincidence that the Armistice was eventually signed on his feast day, although I have never read of any direct connection being explicitly made.

In the UK, many will pause today at 11am for 2 minutes of silence to remember those who have died in conflict. Likewise there will also be similar observances on Remembrance Sunday with red poppies at the centre and worn by all present.

As in previous years, there has been a debate about poppies. Some people find their association with the casualties of WW1 difficult. The poppies had Haig Fund in the middle - the name of the general widely regarded as responsible for the campaigns where so many British (and other) soldiers lost their lives. White poppies have been available to provide a positive alternative to abstaining.

I don't have a problem wearing a poppy on the day; what I find difficult is that poppies appear earlier each year, and seem to be increasingly compulsory, and sometimes even seem to have become a fashion item. The anti-poppy protest at a recent Scottish football match has clearly upset people, but it does seem odd to me that every Scottish Premier League player will have to wear a poppy at the weekend. What about those players whose native countries weren't involved or were on the other side? More to the point is whether remembrance is something you can impose?

If the controversy focuses on the external symbols of remembrance, then we're missing the point. Wearing a poppy doesn't create respect for those who have died - respect is something that has to come from somewhere deeper than that. For others, remembrance is something they wish to keep discreet and internal, and not be forced into expressing it in a fixed form dictated by society at large.

So I won't judge anyone on whether they happen to be wearing a poppy or not. I will be wearing one today and on Sunday as I remember the tragedy and loss of war, so much potential and possibility cut short and as I pray that wars on such scale are never seen again.

My grandfather survived the trenches. I think he only ever spoke 5 or 6 sentences about it in all the time I knew him. He remembered, and I got the impression that he would have been all too happy to forget most of what he had witnessed. We remember his companions who didn't return, and their suffering and sacrifice in the hope that it will inspire future generations to seek justice and peace in a troubled world.

Related articles

• SPL: Anti-poppy banner regrettable (independent.co.uk)

Do you wear a poppy and when?

I have been in on some interesting exchanges about the why and if of wearing a poppy. It seems that everyone on TV is now placed under huge pressure to wear a poppy, especially extra large ones for X-factor contestants, which turns them into a fashion accessory. And they seem to be coming in earlier and earlier, just like Easter eggs and Christmas decorations. I can't help thinking that this is a huge exercise in missing the point.

Don't get me wrong, I shall wear a (basic) poppy on Remembrance Sunday, not because other people want me to, but because I will be remembering a member of my family lost on the Somme in March 1918 and my own grandfather who lived through over two years' horror in the trenches. He survived and lived to an old age, but he lost many friends.

I'll also be aware of all the losses we have seen in recent years in Afghanistan and Iraq. Although much smaller in number than the 'great' wars of the 20th century, we are made all the more aware by the intense media coverage of everyone whose life is lost.

And I'll also be thinking of 14 Nov, the anniversary of the bombing of Coventry in 1940. Having lived there, I realise that the experience still casts a shadow over the city, as it must in many other cities devastated by war. The symbolism of the ruined cathedral is, of course, particularly evocative. For Coventry, it has inspired people to reach out to other communities - hence it is twinned with Dresden.

Remembrance Sunday and Armistice Day are there 'lest we forget' - lest we forget the death, losses, destruction, pain and grief of war, and lest we forget the need to work for peace and reconciliation in the future to try and avoid such things ever happening again.

Whether you choose to wear a poppy or not is a matter of choice; the important question is what kind of a world are you working for. The badge you wear is much less important than the commitments you keep to.